Sunday, November 27, 2011 at 8:11PM Peer Pressure..the good kind
This is Lori with The Generous Wife and I'm excited to guest blog for the Happy Wives Club today.
For years I heard comments like, “I have three kids, two sons and a husband,” or “Geesh, all my husband wants is sex. What a pervert!” It was OK to poke fun at your husband or talk down about your marriage. I got the impression that people didn’t want to be alone in life and marriage was the poor solution. You lived with it because there wasn’t a better option.
But that all changed one day …
At a ladies’ group, a woman shared about her decision to build her marriage (and even enjoy sex!). She had only positive things to say about her husband. We were all sort of in awe of her (and I think a little jealous) as 
she shared her journey. She was truly a “happy wife.” She actively and intentionally invested in her marriage and she was reaping the benefits.
Today I’m delighted to be part of that club and I know that speaking up for your marriage can make a huge difference for others. It gives them courage to find their voice if they are already a “happy wife” and encourages others (with the good kind of peer pressure) to reconsider how they are building their marriage.
Bless you Fawn and the Happy Wives Club! You are making a difference.
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I hope you enjoyed this guest article. As always, I am so grateful to read your comments. Please feel free to post below and let's keep the conversation going. Until tomorrow...make it a great day!
Reader Comments (13)
Thank you, Lori, for sharing some good "peer pressure" with us. When I first married in 2003, I was so disappointed in all the negative talk I heard about marriage. I refused to fall into it but it was also difficult to ignore. I'm so fortunate to now be surrounded by thousands of women who love their husbands and sharing stories about what they do to build them up rather than tear them down. It's a wonderful life!
I think it's good to know that people can still embrace the positive. It's proactive rather being reactive, and huge sign of having very strong personal boundaries.
There are a lot of men and women who allow their spouse or partner to dictate how and even when they can feel and I strongly promote happiness coming from within FIRST.
Hi Jason! I believe you're the first man to comment on one of our blog posts. Whew hoo! It's great to know it's not just us wives encouraging each other but also our husbands. Thanks for stopping by and I hope you'll join the conversation often.
Thanks Lori! You're right, so many people put down their marriage and husband; it's actually the norm. We could easily expose our mates imperfections but then we'd have to pull out our laundry list of shortcomings and personally, I like to keep those to myself:-). It's no secret that we all fall short but the funnest (my fav not-word) part of that is falling short together:-) I love my husband and am so blessed that God put me on his team. Keep spreading this message and I pray that eventually, everyone will catch it!
Christy Joy, You're so right! I saw a Facebook status today (by Bob Marley of all people) that speaks to this exactly:
"He’s not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He isn’t going to quote poetry, he’s not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don’t hurt him, don’t change him, and don’t expect for more than he can give. Don’t analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he’s not there. Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always one guy that is perfect for you."
Bob Marley's quote moved me to tears Fawn. I'm very much an optimist but when it came to my marriage the glass was always half empty. No Grace, no room for error, not a happy wife at all. Let also say not a very happy husband. I would put so much effort into planning an event or helping a friend then investing in the most precious treasure that God had given me. We can get so caught up looking at our husband’s flaws instead of looking inside and working on our own....I praise the Lord for re-do's! How much more should we give grace to our hubby's whom God has chosen for us, let's be their cheerleaders! I can honestly and gratefully say that if you change your mindset, it is much easier being a happy wife than a not so happy wife! Thank you Lori for reminding us to build our husbands up instead of tearing them down....love this blog and thankful for your wisdom today!
Thanks, Evette, for taking the time to comment! When I read this quote on Facebook my first thought was, "Yes, yes, yes!" My second thought was, "I need to repost this!" And my third thoughts was, "This was written by who? Really?" I would have sworn if was written by a woman because of the way it was worded. It certainly touched my soul too.