Author Archives: Byron Davis

About Byron Davis

Byron Davis is a former American record holder, lifestyle career coach and the creator of the popular audio program Unleash The Unstoppable You. He helps people get clear on their passion and shows them how to make a living doing and sharing what they love over at and via his podcast.

Empower Your Husband

7 Quick Ways to Empower Your Husband

Empower Your Husband

It’s not often that one of our husband’s write a post for the Happy Wives Club, but when they do, I’m always over the moon excited!

I don’t know if you’ve found this to be true, but I’ve noticed most men tend to have far fewer words to say than us wives (or is that just in the Weaver household? ;) ). But when they do say something, they try to make it count.

There’s no doubt that’s exactly what Byron Davis with is doing for us today.

And I have a feeling if my wonderful hubby, Keith, happens to stumble across this page tomorrow, he’s going to LOVE this post as much as I did. And hopefully, as much as you will too.

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

Email Signature transparent


Okay ladies, I’m about to admit something that you probably already know - but us guys like to think you don’t (wink, wink):  

In general, guys like to pretend we are totally confident 100% of the time, but the truth is most of us are still little insecure boys (just with bigger toys).

Why am I admitting this to you? Allow me to let you in on another little secret: when you demonstrate to us that you believe in us, or show that you trust us to handle things that you care about, it actually empowers us to keep bringing our A-game to the relationship.

When we know that you are in our corner it actually triggers what behavioral scientist call our “protect and provide” instincts (otherwise known as the “hero gene”) and we can’t help but to let our best selves take the lead in our life.

You see, at any given moment we can be:

a. Our defeated self
b. Our average self or
c. Our best self

Believe it or not, what you say to us carries a tremendous amount of weight. It either builds us up or tears us down (you decide). No matter how much we puff out our chest at times, please don’t forget, how you empower us makes all the difference in the world.

With that said, here are 7 stealthy ways to empower your husband without him even knowing it:

1. Catch your man doing something right:  Ladies, you take multitasking to a whole new level. It amazes us men that you could be on the phone with your girlfriend, changing diapers, and doing the taxes all at the same time. Meanwhile we find it hard to locate the can of soup you asked us to put on the counter (we swear, the soup was not on that shelf when we looked for it).

When we actually get the little things right give us a high five or fist bump (don’t make a big deal out of it because you want to come across like you knew we could do it all the time). It truly does go a long way.

2. Pinch his butt:  Again, the power is in the subtlety. When you flirt with your man it reminds him that you think “he still has it.” Because men, generally speaking, are physical beings by showing that you still find him attractive it boosts his self esteem and increases his emotional connection with you.

3. Thank him for his dedication to the family:  While we can always do things better, when we are acknowledged for effort, and not just the outcome, it shows that you appreciate the stuff that went into making things happen. To turbo charge your influence with this tip, tie his efforts to how it positively impacts the family.

By doing this your man will feel even more motivated to increase his consistency and up his game.

4. Lob him a softball (ask his advice on something- make him feel like a hero): A super simple way to do this is to ask him a question about something he knows a lot about. When you do this and connect it directly to a problem you want solved, your man will feel appreciated and validated for the little things he brings to the relationship.

5. Initiate Sex More Often:  Ladies, this is a big one. No one likes to feel rejected. When your husband starts hinting that he’d like some “play time” with you please remember that for most men there was a lot of emotional ramping up before hand just to approach you. Even if you’ve been married to your husband for 30 years, please realize that he probably still must overcome the fear of rejection whenever he asks you the big question.

To offset this simple fact, initiate 1 out of every 4 or 5 times.

Guess what? He will always be amazed and it will never get old. When you take the initiative in this area from time to time, not only does it subtly reinforce in his mind what he means to you, studies show his confidence in other areas of life instantly increase as well.

6. Quote him to your friends:  My wife uses this one on me a lot, and it works like a charm every time. It’s one thing to share some advice that you got from an expert out of some book, but it’s a whole other thing entirely when the resident expert is you hubby.

Try it for yourself. The next time you are at a dinner party and you are engaging in small talk with another couple say something like, “my husband always says…” and watch how it lights him up. You’ll make him think that he’s the most interesting man in the world!

 7. Trust him with something he currently is convinced you don’t:  I saved the most potent, ninja technique for last. It just might require more confidence from you than you’ve given him in awhile. Look, we men get it; you are great at biting the bullet and getting stuff done. You are so good at it that in most cases you find it easier to just take it all on yourself.

You’ve learned that if you want to make sure it’s done, you’ll just go ahead and do it yourself. But, if you want to boost your man’s confidence and sense of contribution to the family, trust him to do something he knows you are a little afraid to let go of. Yeah he may have let you down in the past. I say that’s all the more reason to give him another shot.

When he realizes that something means a lot to you and that you trust him to accomplish it, it will cause him to tap into new wells of efficacy that take his game to the next level. Heck, he may even be surprised at just how good he could be.

YOUR TURN: Have any of these ninja tactics worked for you?  Do you know one I didn’t mention?  Let me know below and I can’t wait to see your responses.

JOIN THE 1,000,000 MEMBER CHALLENGE: If you haven’t already done it, what are you waiting for? Join the club! It takes only a few seconds and, of course, is free.

Happy Wives Club Book


THE NEW YORK TIMES® BEST-SELLING BOOK: It’s been described as, “Like Eat, Pray, Love but not down on marriage.” Make sure to check out the Happy Wives Club book.  I had the great honor of traveling to 12 countries on 6 continents, interviewing couples happily married 25 years or more, with 1 mission only: to find out what makes marriages happy…and keeps them that way.  It’s a marriage book like none other.  Guaranteed.

Increase Your Happiness by Learning to Fight Fair in Marriage

*Welcome to week five of this 12-week series based on the New York Times® bestselling book, Happy Wives Club.  Join me each week as I share 12 principles about marriage I’ve learned from some of the happiest couples around the world.*


How to Fight Fair in Marriage

There are a few schools of thought when it comes to arguing in marriage.

Some say it is abnormal if you don’t. Others believe it is possible, with the one you love most, to get your point across without pointing fingers.

Either way, there are so many great nuggets of wisdom to be gained by this post by power couple, Byron & Annett Davis.

Welcome to week five of our 12 Weeks to a Happier Marriage series (and if you’re wondering why this is a week late…charge it to my head not my heart).

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

Email Signature transparent


It’s natural, and inevitable that at some point you and your spouse will have a little spat.

Disagreements are normal because, as humans, we all bring different perspectives and experiences to a situation. These differences in view point will naturally create disconnects in communication and understanding.

Resent research reveals that couples who have small disagreements on a regular basis tend to avoid big divisive arguments in the long run.

The reason is simple; small verbal disagreements can actually help couples keep lines of communication open, and honest.  If… they know how to fight fair.

In this post we came up with 10 important practices that we found helps us to not have big battles, and how we’ve learned to communicate to keep our marriage happily in tact. 

We wanted this to be sort of a “he says – she says” post, so Byron’s points have a (B) and Annett’s have an (A) in front of them. We hope this helps you continue on your journey to happily ever after.

How to Increase Your Happiness by Learning to Fight Fair in Marriage

1. Establish the rules of engagement (B):  Your perspective and past experience create the unique lens through which you see the present situation you are in. A lens that may be different from your significant other. This is why setting up the ground rules is so important.  When you create a clear set of short and simple rules (i.e. No malicious attacks to make the other feel small) each of your will always feel safe and ready to address the issue at hand.

2. Stay Away From Absolutes (A):  This is a tough one for me. Speaking in absolutes comes natural to me, but I’ve learned that if we want to be happily married controlling my tongue is very important. Avoid making statements such as “You always…” or “You never…” which most times are exaggerations. No one likes to be told they never or always do something, don’t add fuel to the fire when it’s not necessary.

 3. Define The Win (B):  As it relates to managing disagreements, both parties must have a clear understanding what a mutually beneficial outcome looks like. Annett and I have learned confusion, and misunderstandings are the leading culprits to heated arguments and breakdowns in our communication.  

By first simply working together to bring clarity to the outcome, we defuse tension upfront and eliminate the defensiveness that is bred out of the fear of being the one who loses.

 4. Be Present (A):  Often times it’s easy to lose sight of the problem at hand. We drift back to last weeks or even last years fight. Doing this distracts you from solving the problem at hand.

Stay present! Staying present makes you deal with the here and now. The benefit to this is moving forward you’ll never have a need to bring up past unresolved issues, and you’ll be more effective at putting the current disagreement behind you for good. 

5. Begin with the end in mind (B):  This point is slightly different from “Defining The Win”. Many times we say things in the heat of the moment to win the argument and forget about the collateral damage that our words can cause. Just because you are right, does not give you the right to hurt your spouse. 

As you are addressing the problem always be mindful of how you desire the other person to feel once you both have solved the issue together. Winning an argument is never better than addressing the problem in a mature way that honors the self esteem and self efficacy of the other person. Problems come and go. Your relationship should always be bigger than your challenges.

6. Lose to Win (A):  Talk about humility. This is a difficult pill to swallow, especially for an Olympian who loves to win! But early in our marriage I realized that sometimes I would fight for the “win” at all costs. No matter what it took, right or wrong, I had to win.

I soon learned that what was more important than winning was a sound and happy marriage, and that my mate wasn’t crushed after an argument. Sometimes this meant not being so hell bent on making sure he knew I was right.

What’s so bad about being wrong? What’s so bad about losing an argument?  It’s the perfect chance to say “I’m sorry” and truly mean it.  Now, I’m not saying to always back out, just remember that you and your hubby are a team. If you choose this path, make sure it’s for the right reasons. Which is because you are valuing the relationship more than another win in your record book (the one you shouldn’t be keeping anyway).

7. Be Mindful Of Your Spouses Personality (B):  Like experiences, your spouse’s personality can often impact the emotional tension of the present situation. When personalities clash it’s very easy to get distracted, turning your focus away from the problem and onto the other person. Your spouse’s personality should not be a surprise to you. If their personality is loud and demonstrative, the chances are very good that they will be loud and demonstrative when things get heated.

The last thing you want to do is attack their personality right in the middle of a spat. If their behavior is making you feel bad say something like, “I know you don’t mean to put me down, but when you express your point this way I can’t help but feel attacked when I know we both want what’s best.”  By remembering the other person’s personality you give yourself permission to not take things too personally, and honor both the other person and yourself at the same time.

8. Control Your Tone (A):  A conversation can go from a simple disagreement to a full on war in a matter of minutes if you begin to speak louder. Sure we all get irritated. Yes I know you want your point to be heard, but just because you get louder doesn’t make the other person ‘hear’ you.

What actually happens when we raise our voice is the other person starts to get more upset, and begins to shut down (and shut you out). Most times they will then raise their voice to be ‘heard’ over you and as a consequence no one is actually heard at all.  Master yourself by controlling your tone and the outcome can come to a happier conclusion much faster. This is the only way your partner will truly hear you.

9. Be Tough On The Problem & Not On The Person (B):  Always remember, as my Granny used to always say, “everything is figure-out-able!” No matter how challenging the problem is, inherent in every problem are the keys to its own solution. The trick is to work the problem and support the other person through the process. It is very easy to allow your frustration with the problem to spill over onto the other person.

No matter the origins of the problem, or who is technically at fault, take advantage of the fact that when both parties take full ownership of the situation grace, humility, and mutual respect automatically cause your love for each other to deepen -and a new level of intimacy will actually be experienced while you both get tough on the problem together.

 10. Finish Well (A):  When we have our disagreements we always like to recap to make sure that there are no loose ends. We never walk out on the discussion until it’s completely over. Even if you chose to voluntarily lose the fight make sure you aren’t holding on to resentment or play the martyr.  In addition, if you have messed up and yelled at your spouse, or fired some unkind words don’t leave the conversation without asking for forgiveness.

Before you leave the room make sure you both acknowledge your love for one another, and if you are a prayerful person go ahead and pray together. Later on that night, go ahead and get your groove on remembering that a fight is only momentary, but your love and your marriage will always stand the test of tough times.

YOUR TURN: What are some other great rules of engagement that you’ve lived by to help you get through tough times together?  Leave your comments below.

7 Simple Ways to Create a Marriage That Rocks

7 Simple Ways to Create a Marriage That Rocks

7 Simple Ways to Create a Marriage That Rocks

It is rare for our home page to be turned over to the husband of one of our members.  But the few times it has happened, it has always been a genuine treat.  Today is no exception.

Byron Davis is a life and career coach, the founder of Live Your Epic Life, and most importantly, a phenomenal husband.  I know this about him because I know him personally, as well as his beautiful wife, Annett. 

He adores his wife.  Is never afraid to dote over her in public.  Respects her.  And is her greatest supporter.

Annett and Byron were college sweethearts, and although they celebrated their 17th anniversary last year, I can honestly say they still remind me of two newlyweds.

I have watched their relationship over the years and their love -and marriage- is the real deal.  And now he’s joining us to share some simple tips on creating, and maintaining, a beautiful marriage that lasts a lifetime.

Until Monday…make it a great weekend!

Email Signature transparent


There are a few times a year when it just feels right to declare epic shifts and we desire to push the reset button on purpose in order to reboot our lives.

The first month of the year is one of those times. Now is the perfect time to refresh our minds, our bodies, and our marriages so that we continue to make our marriages “epic” by intentionally making the rest of our lives the best of our lives!

7 Simple Ways to Create a Marriage That Rocks!

1. Keep Your Marriage A Top Priority

I realize this first one should go without saying but everyone knows how “life” goes. We get busy and over extended and the first two things we seem to always neglect are our health and our marriages. Get clear about the 2 or 3 things you and your spouse love doing together every month and protect those times together. Put them in your schedule immediately before the tyranny of the urgent sets in.

2. Renew Your Vows In A Fun And Creative Way

Renewing our vows is always a special time. If you have not done it in awhile, why not have some fun with it. Instead of the traditional “church” or scenic park, why not arrange to do it on the back nine of a golf course, or on surf boards, or on the top of Mount Whitney. I think you get the drift. Make renewing your vows an epic and creative event to commemorate the bond between you two.

3. Put Your Spouse First Then Your Kids

Just like it makes sense to place your oxygen mask on before you place the mask on your kids (in case of an emergency plane landing), it’s important to take care of the health of your marriage before you attend to the kids.

This is great advice for two simple reasons: 1. If you truly want the best for your kids, then be sure to model the best in front of your kids. 2. The more strong and happy you are with your spouse the stronger and happier the whole family will be. My family is one of the happiest I’ve ever seen, and I truly believe it’s because my wife and I laugh and have fun together (it rubs off on the entire family).

4. Have a “State of The Union” Address

The first month of the year is a great time to take a walk in the park with your spouse and dream about how you want your year to play out. Highlight the blessings and milestones over the past year and establish what new and exciting things you will look forward to together. When you connect through this sort of exercise it puts both of your heads and hearts on the same page which instantly deepens the relationship without any more effort.

Here’s how we did ours (with all the questions we asked included)!

5. Change The World Together

Decide to be “that couple”, you know the one that gets all of your couple friends to volunteer for a day or do an epic bike ride or walk for a cause. When you both work together on something neutral like this, it brings you together in a unique sort of way that celebrates the “philanthropist” in both of you. Lead together. Don’t just do it together. Together, get others to join you.

6. Out Give Each Other

When both parties decide to try to out give each other unconditionally, it brings out the creativity in how you express appreciation for one another. Out giving each other also causes you to be more observant and in-tune with each others needs, wants, and desires. This regular kind of attention to each other develops a servant’s heart and a deeper appreciation for what each of you brings to the relationship.

7. Become Each Others Biggest Fan

This one is powerful. Ladies, take it from me, a “man’s man”; sometimes we are insecure little boys at heart and the one vote of confidence that trumps all others is yours. When you encourage and correct us (by making it seem like it was our idea, in the ninja sort of way that you do) we feel like we can take on the world and would do anything in turn to support you. When both parties are in on the act, the more you give, truly the more you’ll also receive.

Make Today Epic,


Question:  What things do you intentionally do to make your marriage rock?


JOIN THE 1,000,000 MEMBER CHALLENGE: If you haven’t already done it, what are you waiting for? Join the club! It takes only a few seconds and, of course, is free.