4 Ways to Pick Great Gifts for Your Husband’s Personality

By Cheri Gregory on Wednesday, December 11, 2013

4 ways to pick great gifts for your husbands personality

I’ve long been fascinated with personality traits.  So much of what we do, how we react to certain situations, were based on predispositions.

When I was young, I’d hear, “She’s got a whole lot of personality!”  That was to say, I was strong-willed, hard headed and liked being right.

Some traits are learned.  Others are innate.

Taking various personality tests helped me understand how I was wired and how to build upon my strengths while improving my weaknesses.

What I love about this post and what Cheri Gregory does is she studies personalities for a living and tells us how to use that information to create and live the life we desire most.

And in this post, based on The Four Temperaments (take free quiz here), she shows you how to choose great gifts for your husband’s personality.

Until tomorrow…make it a great one!

Email Signature transparent


As newlyweds, Daniel and I made a point to relax together on the couch each evening.

While we caught up on each other’s day, I’d rub his neck, and he’d give me a foot massage.

One day about six months into our marriage, Daniel stopped mid-sentence, got a quizzical look on his face, and asked, “Do you prefer foot massages or neck rubs?”

“Neck rubs,” I responded, confused.

Then the light bulb went on.

I asked him, “Which do you prefer?”

Sure enough! 

“Foot massages,” he replied.

Armed with new knowledge, we switched: I started giving him foot massages, and he started giving me neck rubs.

We were happier on two levels.

As receivers, we were now getting what we most wanted. And as givers, we knew for certain that what we were giving was greatly valued.


Making the Personality Connection

Selecting Christmas gifts that match your husband’s personality type can give this same mutual satisfaction.

Gifts that connect with your husband’s personality goals and emotional needs are likely to be received as highly practical. And on a deeper level, they demonstrate your understanding and respect of who he is as a person.

Here are some quick guidelines and ideas to get started:

Sanguine: the Popular Personality

Goal:  Fun

Needs:  Attention and Approval

Gift Ideas

  1. Comedy DVDs to watch and laugh at together;
  2. Invitation for a “Mystery Trip” together (to a fun destination);
  3. A ridiculous gag gift.

Melancholy: the Perfect Personality

Goal:  Perfection

Needs:  Sensitivity and Order

Gift Ideas

  1. Organizational device for some area of disorder in the house;
  2. “Quiet Coupons” he can use when he needs silence and solitude;
  3. A book that combines key interests (i.e. the effect of music on the brain)

Choleric: the Powerful Personality

Goal:  Control

Needs:  Achievement and Appreciation

Gift Ideas

  1. The latest does-it-all gadget;
  2. An engraved pen and pencil set (for making and checking items off lists);
  3. A customized World’s Best Husband award

Phlegmatic: the Peaceful Personality

Goal: Peace

Needs: Self-Worth and Comfort

Gift Ideas

  1. A cushy beanbag chair or comfortable blanket for chillaxing;
  2. A CD of a favorite musician or genre of music;
  3. Coupons for “Movie Night” at home (complete with his favorite home-made snacks).

The One-Size-Fits-All Gift  

Write, print, and frame a list of things you love about your man.

  • If he’s Sanguine, be sure to include the ways he makes you smile and laugh.
  • If he’s Melancholy, list how he makes your life better.
  • For a Choleric, focus on all he does for you.
  • And for a Phlegmatic, note the ways he keeps you on an even keel. 

Personality Resources

  • Free eBook: Top 10 Priceless Gifts for Each PURSE-onality that Don’t Cost a Dime
  • Videos: “You’ve Got PURSE-onality!”
  • Audio:  De-LIGHT-full Giving in a Weighty World

What ideas would you add to these lists?


JOIN THE 1,000,000 MEMBER CHALLENGE: If you haven’t already done it, what are you waiting for? Join the club! It takes only a few seconds and, of course, is free.

Cheri Gregory is a Certified Personality Trainer; contributor/co-author of a dozen books, including Wired That Way and 21 Ways to Connect With Your Kids (with Kathi Lipp); and frequent speaker for MOPS groups, women's retreats, parent workshops, and educational seminars. She holds an M.A. in Leadership and is working on her PhD. Cheri has been "wife of my youth" to Daniel, a pastor, for over a quarter-of-a-century; they have two college-aged kids. She blogs about expectations, “baditude”, and hope at CheriGregory.com/blog.


Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are snarky, offensive, or off-topic. If in doubt, read My Comment Policy
  • rose_mae

    great ideas..this really helps…thanks

    • http://www.cherigregory.com/ Cheri Gregory

      Rose Mae — So glad you found them valuable!

  • http://www.rocksolidfamily.com/ Anastacia Maness

    I have the hardest time finding the perfect gift for my husband. He’s a phlagmatic melancholy and his primary love language is gifts. Which is tough because that isn’t my strongest skill. Many times I have felt like I gave him the wrong gift even though he seems to appreciate it.

    He has found me what he has proclaimed the perfect gift. I haven’t found anything yet! Help! Oh, my primary love language is quality time so all this gift giving, even though I enjoy, it isn’t nearly as special as spending time with family.

    You’ve got me thinking though. I think I’m focusing too much on specific things. Maybe I need to look outside of the box for that perfect gift. Thanks for this post!

    • http://www.cherigregory.com/ Cheri Gregory

      Anastacia — For a phlegmatic melancholy, something personalized can be an excellent choice. How about a collage of photos of the two of you, surrounded by words and phrases that come to your mind when you think of him? Ps and Ms are often overlooked, even made fun of, for their strengths (laid-back = lazy, detailed = anal-retentitiave), so reflecting back the positive qualities you see in him can be a powerful affirmation.

      • http://www.rocksolidfamily.com/ Anastacia Maness

        Oooh! Thank you! That is a great idea. I’ll pick up a scrapbook and get the kids to help me with it. I let them do pages with pictures of each of them with him and I’ll do some of me and him together. He’ll love that and gives me the opportunity to help the kids share all the things they love about him as well. Cheri, I can’t thank you enough! :-)

  • http://www.memeoirs.com memeoirs

    Love the article Cheri! We’ve invented an application which allows you to turn your emails into a beautiful book. It works well for sentimental guys (and girls!). We’d love for you to take a look… http://www.memeoirs.com

  • mbloughery


    I love your article!! Though, I seem to be a bit late.. I’m buying for a melancholy choleric and I’ve become stumped! I have a few things that he told me he needs: polo v-neck tee’s and a small overnight/weekend bag. However, my gift from him is a trip to San Diego with him all expenses paid, and I feel like I need something more for him! My major dilemma is that he has a watch which he only recently received and I am in the process of making a photo book for our anniversary!! Please Help!!

  • Kendra Burrows

    This is great! Thanks for breaking it down so simply.