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5 Important Ways Marriage Has Made Me Better

5 Important Ways Marriage Has Made Me Better

When I first read this post by HWC contributor, Christine St. Vil, my first thought was, “If I had a dollar for every way marriage has made me a better person I’d be a very rich woman!”

For one, it has stretched me.  It has pushed me out of my comfort zone.  And in the process, made me a much kinder, less selfish, and far more patient and loving woman.

My husband is quick to point out that I was incredibly happy as a single woman.  I had no problem walking into a restaurant and proudly saying, “Dinner for one, please.”

I did not get married because I thought marriage would make me happy nor did I believe I needed someone to complete me.  

I got married because I’ve always believed marriage enhances your life.  That although we could probably make it through this cold world by ourselves, why would we want to?

My husband has made me a better person in every possible sense of the word.  A more loving and humble person.  Would I have arrived at this place without marriage?  Possibly.  But I’m so grateful it wasn’t necessary.

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

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I am still on a marriage high from the launch of the Happy Wives Club book, and all of the amazing blog posts submitted for the blog tour. I haven’t gotten through all of the posts, but the ones that I’ve read have been so inspiring.

I’ve literally been thinking about all of the reasons I’m a happy wife, and how blessed I am to have a happy marriage. It’s been so refreshing to be a part of this community and to see the amount of love there is in marriages all over the world. These are the stories we don’t see or hear enough of, but hopefully that will change soon.

It’s so easy to take for granted what you have because it’s so comfortable and you’re so used to having it. But I literally give thanks every day for my husband and my marriage. I know we make each other a better, and I couldn’t help but think of the different ways that marriage has indeed made me a better person.

5 Important Ways Marriage Has Made Me Better

1. I’m more giving. For as long as I can remember, my husband has always been the type of person to give the shirt off his back to anyone that needed it, without asking any questions. And although I love to help people and give to people as well, I used to always want to ask questions first.  Witnessing the amount of humility my husband possesses has made me want to give more freely and openly.

2. I’ve learned to compromise. Growing up the sixth child out of seven, I got accustomed to fighting or arguing my way through situations. It was one way or another, and rarely anything in between. Marriage has taught me that we don’t always have to want the same thing but we should always be willing to give up something (even temporarily) so that the other can have.

3. I’m learning more patience. I talk about this all of the time because while I still have a little ways to go, I’ve come an even longer way in this regard. I used to be quick to jump to conclusions and quick to snap at anyone that I thought was challenging me.  Through my husband’s actions and guidance, I’ve learned to listen first before opening my mouth. Marriage has allowed me to grow in patience, which in turn has strengthened not only my marriage, but other relationships as well.

4. I’ve learned to trust. When you go through different things in life and you’ve been burnt a time or two, naturally you treat everyone as if they are going to hurt you too. Marriage has opened me up to trusting in ways I was never able to in the past. It’s allowed me to truly understand what it means to trust completely.

5. I’ve learned to express myself. I am a first generation American, and grew up with very African parents deep rooted in culture. Talking back or forming an opinion that was against theirs was unheard of. Obviously, that’s all they knew as that was how they were raised.

Naturally, I always found it difficult to speak my mind and express my feelings, good or bad as I grew older. My husband is the one who made me feel safe and comfortable in sharing my feelings, which allows for more open and honest communication.

Marriage is beautiful. Marriage is amazing. Marriage has made me a better person in more ways than one.

QUESTION: What are some ways that marriage has changed you for the better?


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Christine St.Vil is co-author of the Whose Shoes Are Your Wearing: 12 Steps to Uncovering the Woman You Really Want to Be. A happy wife to an amazing hubby of 8 years, and homeschooling mother of three, she teaches moms how to FLY (First Love Yourself). She uses her corporate background to work with women who are ready to start a new business, accelerate their career growth & design a life they love. She's on a mission to help moms to battle the mom guilt epidemic, so they can begin to put themselves first on their never-ending list of priorities. Sign up at for her FREE audio: 8 Ways to Get Your FLY Back - The Super Simple Guide for Busy Moms to FLY (First Love Yourself).

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